Dear NiggaKnow,

I got a problem, and I need some light shed on this situation at my office. Some black light. I work for a company full of nerdy-ass bitches, my boss is a helmet-wearing retard that never leaves his office, and all I do all day every day is sit in front of a computer. I can’t even look at porn because there’s a glass door on my damn office. So anyways, this uppity ass bitch just got promoted and she’s taking it out on everyone. Now I’m not about to put up with the bullshit she’s shelling out (i’m white, but i’m not that white…plus, it’s a fucking GIRL), but all I can do is this stupid passive-aggressive shit that doesn’t actually mean shit. It’s kinda hard to get that ‘fuck you’ emphasis when all I do is delete the email she sends me.

So I’m asking you. I’m begging you. What do I do? Do I quit? Do I hide some raw shrimp in her chair? Do I slash her tires? Or do I just quit the job, rob the place and sell all the computers and cameras and shit on eBay?

John

Dear White Office Motherfucker,

So some trick ass bitch get herself a little closer to that glass ceiling and now you supposed to take shit all day? Nah, fuck that. If she ain’t your boss and she trying to tell you what the fuck you got to do - then you got to tell her to fall the fuck back. Put a bitch in her place. I mean, I know its an office environment and shit but the rules of the street still apply in some respects. On the motherfucking street if some yapping ass cunt come up and start telling you some shit that you ain’t tryna hear, you got to choke up on the bitch bat for real. Before she even get to her second hand wave or that third head shake, that bitch gonna get her motherfucking lights put the fuck out and its a wrap. One and one, nigga: one blow and one knocked out cunt who used to think she had some upperhand in your shit.

Well, you ain’t working in the streets and I know you can’t do no motherfucking violent shit like that in your motherfucking cubicles, but the principles is what its about nigga. If she ain’t your motherfucking boss, you got to tell her in a professional manner, in perfect white motherfucker office speak that she need to shut the fuck up and stay on track with her own shit. You got the work you doing all day, and that cunt got papers to put in a motherfucking drawer and phones to answer.

Keep it real with your damn self.

One.

Related Posts:

• Half Nigga Fired For Reading Nigga Know
• Kramer Didn’t Teach Ya’ll Motherfuckers Anything?
• Hardware on the Cheap
• Bombs Over Paypal
• NAVY - Accelerate Your Life, And The Dryness Of Your Dick