So I don’t know if all of you true hood niggas heard this shit, but I guess them sleepyheaded video game motherfuckers at Nintendo thought they Wii systems wasn’t gay enough and decided that white motherfuckers needed to read Digg on they Televisions, when them shits ain’t bumpin out season 1 Growing Pains or whatever shit that stupid white motherfuckers be wasting they paychecks on.

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Valentine’s day came and went and if you one of them sorry ass niggas that ain’t got a stable of bitches, your boy Big Eddie Ed got some helpful shit to throw at you. Oh and don’t come at a nigga on the defensive, writing some shit like you ain’t even need help in those comments. Too many of you anonymous internet niggas be making some lofted ass claims about the motherfucking gaggles of hoes they fucked when all those niggas ever hit was they priest or they boyscout troop leader. Lying ass motherfuckers. 90% of you bitch-made niggas be pounding your motherfucking dick raw watching some of that Sleepyhead cartoon shit with all them octopus legs.

Any damn way, you motherfuckers know that internet dating bullshit ain’t new. You seen all the commercials with them old age crispy white motherfuckers, talking at the screen, saying some shit like you gone meet a bitch and settle the fuck down. I mean, not only is that some straight bullshit they telling you, but its just white motherfuckers trying to get money. You ain’t gonna marry no internet bitch, but they don’t know that shit. Let a nigga tell you about women for a hot motherfucking minute.

Bitches always acting like the whole world’s they own shiny ass story book and they some kind of princess. They spend they whole lifes thinking that one day, some white motherfucker in a bedazzled ass suit gone roll up on a white motherfucking pony and sweep they ass off to some magical castle where SHE gonna live happy and that nigga gonna spend every last goddamn cent on her whiney babytalk ass. They absolutely believe all that shit. They feel they entitled to some royalty shit all because they got a motherfucking pussy.

Now, you motherfuckers ain’t got a shot in hell at being no prince gonna snatch a bitch up and throw ice for years, but how the fuck does that bitch know? Its internet dating nigga and you could be whatever the fuck you want to tell a bitch.

The shit is simple. All you got to do is flip on a few motherfucking checkboxes, tell a bitch you working out 3 times a week, and add like 3 inches to your height. Lying about all the shit that keep your dick dry seem to be the only way to get the motherfucking job done. You got to be taller, thinner, stronger, smarter, richer, and you got to love some motherfucking puppies and shit. If you need help filling this shit out, steal all the answers from another motherfucking profile - preferrably one where that bitch-made faggot holding a book or a motherfucking rose.

Want Children? Fuck yeah you want some motherfucking kids. Do you really? Fuck no, and if you do end up knocking this bitch, you ain’t even gonna know they name.

That’s real. One.

Let me start off this shit by telling you just what the fuck make Big Eddie Ed want to choke some white people: that trifling ass government we got. These motherfucking senators always tryna make it look like they doing they jobs by taking some good shit and putting a motherfucking stop to it. That shit started with that nigga Joe Lieberman trying to keep violent video games off the shelves and it continue today. For serious, those shifty white motherfuckers going too far once again, my niggas.

Any damn way, some Senator ain’t nobody ever heard of in NY is proposing a law to make it illegal to be on the streets while using an electronic device. That mean that if you rolling out all aggitated tryna soothe your shit with some Earth Wind and Fire you gonna get fined the minute your unscuffed Air-force 1’s touch the crosswalk. Why?

Because another white motherfucker got killed.

Some white motherfucker, probably buying stocks at the time, gets clobbed by a motherfucking firetruck and now I can’t use my motherfucking hands-free to make it clear to a few bitches just how little child support they gonna get? That’s some bullshit for real. Just because white people don’t got that sideways Pele vision don’t mean I can’t dodge a whip and handle a jack. I mean, black people got that sixth sense when it come to dodging shit that could END us. That’s why we make better runningbacks and that’s also how niggas can drive with they left foot out the window on the side mirror. We got perception, you dumb white bitches, and now we gonna get fined for it just because a white motherfucker can’t see a tank rolling down 125th when he got a little Bryan Adams in his motherfucking ear canals.

Here’s a better solution: instead of taxing niggas for they proficiency in gadgets, how about you penalize white people for they inability to do more than one motherfucking thing at a time? The next time some white jogger goes from 12 to 65 miles per hour and living to dead at the same instant, tax that niggas family for being related to some inept dead white motherfucker who just HAD TO hook his faggot ass Nano into his bitch-made iPod ready Nikes. That white jogger got money he got to lose, but the white government ain’t gonna let a nigga get at no paper.

I just want the government to stop trying to look busy by taking away all the shit we love, like them nasty ass blowjob booths, or video games, and especially white people getting run the fuck down by vehicles they ain’t even aware of.

If you reading this shit right now, close your motherfucking eyes and listen real close. If you motherfuckers concentrate hard enough, you might hear some bitch-made nerdy niggas crying up a motherfucking storm about how Microsoft been pulling some grimey shit on that WikiPedia. Serves those bitch niggas right and I’ll let you know why, but raise up off these motherfucking nuts - I’ll tell you when the fuck I tell you, yadadamean?

Before I write another motherfucking word, I want to make it known that I ain’t got no love for no motherfucking WikiPedia. The site got too many white motherfuckers monitoring the shit and getting loud on them comment pages too much. You motherfuckers ain’t special. Just because you dunking keys for weeks about some sleepyheaded ass video game character you be dressing up as with your equally faggot assed white motherfucker friends don’t mean I got to show love to nobody. Those Wiki niggas already made it crystal that Nigga Know ain’t worthy of a motherfucking article, so I ain’t got no motherfucking use for some bitch-made repository of white facts - like how many buttons you gotta have on the suit you throw on when you tryna cash in on some whiteness and nail that motherfucking job interview. White people don’t know shit about knowledge any damn how.

So Microsoft been getting all fucked up about some articles about that open source document standard bullshit and they own formats. Basically that nigga Bill Gates, or whoever the fuck, all PISSED OFF at some Wiki bullshit they saying got mad inaccurate shit in it. They even try to do shit the right way, but sometimes when niggas is saying shit that ain’t about what you about, you got to do those niggas dirty - and doing that grimey shit involved hiring a blogging ass white motherfucker to go out there and change that motherfucking Wiki shit.

So now that they bored with they faggot ass Wii systems and they ain’t got shit else to do, white motherfuckers all around the globe been doing a lot of belly-aching and shit. Complaining that Microsoft been doing some evil shit. I mean, who gives a fuck about the whole motherfucking non-issue? Wiki-Pedia? That nigga Bill Gates or whoever the fuck?

The FUCK out here with ALL that shit.

I’m doing my own motherfucking complaining and not because some nigga changed some white article shit. I’m about to blow off on a nigga because Microsoft ain’t do the right thing and holla at some tech savvy ass niggas to get the job done and walk off into the motherfucking sunset with all that paper they throwing the fuck around. Changing Wiki-pedia is just like any other thing I don’t give a fuck about doing - you want that shit done, then pay a nigga.

That’s all you gone get for now, you eager ass motherfuckers. I hope you learned some shit from what the fuck I’m telling you. White motherfuckers ready to pay for that grimey ass shit. Get yours. One.

You motherfuckers that been with NiggaKnow since the beginning know that we dunked keys on a gaggle of them jacks. A motherfucking gaggle, nigga. We all over them MP3 grips, jacks, and all that - and today we got a update about that latest shit: The iPhone. Oh, and before you shifted ass white motherfuckers decide you got to say some shit about how we late on this, fall the fuck back. Only reason we coming late on this because I had hope on the motherfucking street that this bitch-made bullshit was some kind of white hoax. I’m like the only nigga out there right now that hate the shit. Only me and that nigga Bill Gates.

Any damn way, I got to talk shit on that iPhone bull. That shit got me aggitated, so be warned, white motherfuckers. If you got here from Digg or whatever the fuck, strap your motherfucking safety belts on because you might actually get out your chair for once when you read some real shit that criticizes Apple and ain’t the text version of sucking that nigga Steve Jobs dick.

The iPhone is basically a touchscreen iPod that you could hook up to some faggot ass Cingular service. That Apple Jack work well for some shit, but most of the time it ain’t worth a fuck. For example, that iPhone shit ain’t worth a fuck when it come to looking like you ain’t a faggot, but on the other hand the motherfucker second to none when it come to dropping calls and getting clipped outta white fingers.

THE iPHONE AND WHITE MOTHERFUCKERS:
MADE FOR EACH OTHER

Touchscreen iPod and Phone? The fuck out with that bullshit. How the fuck you gone get excited about a iPod with Jack capabilities you can’t even holla at black bitches with? This the type of shit only those white bitches be tolerating. The minute a black bitch find out you tryna call her with a motherfucking Apple Jack that bitch gonna ruin your motherfucking eardrums. Its all good though, white people. At least you could give your favorite John Tesh mp3 a +1 in that Play Count column as your eyes drip and you write about your faggot ass feelings on your motherfucking Livejournal.

Apple Jack? Nigga, FUCK Steve Jobs.

Shit is strictly for white motherfuckers. No niggas getting excited about some shit from Steve Jobs. That shit could up and change the minute the nigga start handing out some shit redesigned for niggas, but until then that nigga don’t get a sheet out my motherfucking reams.

We got the first post of the oh-Seven dedicated to a popular motherfucking theme at that CES shit I blew off so I could throw gwap at them bitch-made losing ass Giants: The Pocket PC. These shits is computers that motherfuckers keeping next to they keys that grimey niggas don’t even need when they decide your whip got parts for dollars. Oh yeah and before I continue, tip a little out for that eloquent nigga Tiki Barber and the career he used to have. Hope you happy doing that white man soft shoe shit on them McDonald’s commercials with your motherfucking Cosby ass smiling face.

Any damn way, Pocket PCs about to flood the market for real, but the shit I seen looking mad gay. They got this shit called the SX-GEN that supposed to be this bangin ass computer you could holla at them myspace breezies with, but the motherfucker look like a garage door opener and when you finally unfold this gigantic ass shit you need like 2 desks to even tell a nigga that you got to call him back because your brand new faggot ass Pocket PC is too big to unfold on the train.

Oh yeah, and this shit ain’t cheap neither. You gonna be laying out like $1,400 for this shit - and it ain’t even gonna replace that bitch-made jack you bought last year - it ain’t a jack, it ain’t pretty, and the shit ain’t slick neither. You see that screen? How the fuck you gonna have a 3 foot long keyboard and a screen smaller than that bitch made Zune?

This shit look like it was a motherfucking science project. I mean, look at the shit - ain’t nothing slick about it. There’s all these jagged ass screws, all the hinges look like they used to be on a motherfucking pet cage, and the fold out keyboard so thin that the sleepyheads that be buyin the motherfucker could use the shit as a motherfucking ninja star and lacerate niggas for weeks. That’s irresponsible technology my niggas. I mean, you got to anticipate sleepyhead aggression even though they always got the same uninterested bored ass expression on they faces - looking like they listening to weather forecasts on they brightly colored mp3 grips.

So before you niggas go off on that Pocket PC bandwagon, realize that the hype is driven by the white motherfuckers. White motherfuckers always think they got they hands on the next big thing - yet they still ain’t invented some shit to prevent they evil white ways. All they do is try to push some bulky ass shit that nobody give a fuck about so they stocks earn more nigga dollars.

Fuck a Pocket PC right now. You know I’m holdin out hope some sleepyheaded corporation like Samsung gonna roll out a jack that electrocute a white motherfucker whenever he decide to pop his collar and shout some Chappelle or Borat lines at a Applebees. I mean, a nigga can dream. Say word.

One.

Okay white people we all understand you think you so goddamn important - so believe a nigga when they tell you that you don’t got to be talking that white bullshit on the motherfucking train. The worst of all the shit is that you doing it with a motherfucking bluetooth headset - not concentrating, staring off into space. You could get the motherfucking bicuspids knocked the fuck out your mouth you stop paying attention and stare at a nigga saying some shit like how much you love that British nigga House. Yeah, another motherfucking Doctor show and the only black dude on that shit is that nigga that filled the fuck in for Wesley Snipes when he decide he too motherfucking black to play Willie Mays Hayes in the sequel. HOUSE? The fuck out here with that bullshit.

You can’t be gawking off into space on the train. You think its all good because shits a accident or whatever, but we ain’t trying to hear some white excuses. I mean, we ain’t gonna come out and smash a grill without being polite, we gonna ask you nicely just what the fuck you said and then you gonna be picking up some dental work up off the tracks. It is what it is, but it definitely ain’t no opportunity for white snippiness when someone ask you what the fuck you want.

Shut the fuck up and look at the motherfucking ground with your evil white eyes.

Oh and don’t be acting like you all high tech and shit because you got a motherfucking bluetooth. That shit ain’t new nigga. Niggas been commanding white motherfuckers in space for days when it come time to get shit done for real. You white pasty motherfuckers wearing that bluetooth shit like you Billy Dee Williams slave from all them Star Wars joints.

So remember my white motherfuckers that be reading this shit on the daily: Everybody got a bluetooth headset, but not every nigga got a tolerance for white conversations. Keep your eyes on the motherfucking ground and shut the fuck up or we gone make a whistle out your grill. Unforgivable.

So that’s what the fuck you get today. Check the new motherfucking videos we put up on the daily and please quit aggitating niggas.

One.

You know that a war been waging on and I’m not talking about the middle east or that bullshit ass TV joint “The War At Home” with Remy from Higher Learning. I’m talking about the war that’s blazing hot right now between all them MP3 grips - and there’s basically like two sides: Apple and Microsoft. Sony, Creative Labs, and Rio - yah need to take your shit to the motherfucking curb with all them James Blunt records and Joey Season One DVD sets. Your shit is garbage nigga. For serious.

You could ask any motherfucker and they gone tell you that this motherfucking year is all about the two most notable MP3 shits: That faggot ass iPod and that motherfucking Zune.. and Microsoft be all lit up on tellin niggas what the fuck they feel about that i-Pod.. even though that zune is equally bitch-made.

Now, all you shifty motherfuckers know what the fuck we think about that iPod, so let a nigga educate the masses about that Zune.

The Zune got a screen that won’t make a nigga squint when he watching his Kobe Tai shits like he don’t even give a fuck. I mean, this ain’t no motherfucking Gameboy screen niggas - for real.. and on the other motherfucking hand, the iPod got some fucked up Nokia cellphone screen or some shit. You can’t even tell if you watching A Spike Lee Joint or a Spring Thomas ass to mouth video.

That Zune also got the ability to send shit to a motherfucker through that WIFI, so you could be dropping them old ass Fat Boys tracks on a nigga while you rollin on the motherfucking bus. I mean, how you gonna argue with crispy ass video and wireless song sharing? Oh yeah - them nasty ass colors. Earth tones, nigga? Them 1978 Three’s Company furniture colors is DISTRACTING.

I ain’t gonna back no iPod, but I can’t back that Zune neither. The only other shit that holds a nigga back on that Zune is that “Welcome to the Social” marketing shit they flooding the public with. Fuck a social. I just need to get at my motherfucking MP3’s, and watch them videos. The ideal shit would be getting a Sleepyhead scientist on the payroll to turn the whole shit into a motherfucking jack - but that’s years away.

Oh and I don’t give a fuck about no celebrity endorsements you trying to get nigga. Come with them real endorsements. I check the motherfucking bands in the Zune store and its a gaggle of them black glasses and red tie wearing white motherfuckers singing about they bad experiences in they 3rd grade lunchroom. How the fuck you gone try to act like Jay Z gonna give a fuck about the Zune?

Yeah, he don’t even know who the fuck you is. So basically, it may be a motherfucking MP3 Christmas my niggas - but it sure ain’t no iPod or Zune Christmas. Hold out for them all in one jacks that got all these features and more. Let a sleepyhead work on that for a minute.

One.

First things first: Imma explain this picture brief like that guy posing as Ben Ferguson in the comments when he with a transvestite hooker behind that gas station under the F train. Lemme explain: this fucking faggot is not only pissed cuz his fake name is Ferguson, and that he 45 years old and has to clean the toilets that some fresh outta CUNY Brooklyn young niggas with flashy smiles - who make more paper in a week than Fake Benjamin sees in a motherfucking year - just fucking dropped some rock hard lincoln logs in. He also pissed that he ain’t never seen pussy that wasn’t paid for and smelling like rotten motherfucking rat shit in a motherfucking minute, and he gotta settle for a mexican bitch named “Chrissie” who has a motherfucking dick and a set of sandpaper brown balls (no homo), in the back of the 1987 Toyota, and even then he can’t get his little fag dick up and when he do he busts a nut in 46 seconds as soon as Raoul, I mean Chrissie, touches her mustache to Fake Benjamin’s stomach. Eat a dick, “Ben,” you Max Hardcore looking cheap ass clown, and all you other WWF watching, Walmart hopping, overweight motherfuckers who done forgot what it’s like to be loved by a pussy that wasn’t immediately related to you. Faggots.

Anyways, for all you loyal Niggaknow soldiers, here what the Last Real New Yawker think bout the Wii. You motherfuckers is all probably saying, “How is it, that these negroes, who show their love for expensive video game systems attached to the interior of their vehicles all the time on Black Entertainment Television and on that show ‘Pimp My Ride’ with that Exhibit character, have not mentioned any of them on this website?” Well I can’t speak for my nigga Eddie Ed but I can speak for my god damn self. First off: the PS3 is $599. That some thick paper right there, and I’m not tryna wind up in the cage after I stick up some sleepyhead for that shit after creeping with my nigga in his conspicuous-ass white Navigator and scoping out some malls in Teaneck, NJ. And I’m not standing on line with some fat white parents in baggy Fruit of the Loom t-shirts with they whiny little whiny white kids for six weeks to buy some bullshit that don’t got any hot games or any hot features besides that Blu-Ray bullshit. And until they got Kobe Tai on them Blu-Ray disks, what the fuck do I need Blu-Ray for, nah mean? What about the XBox 360? What about that shit nigga, I got my reasons for not having that shit, and I’m not gonna talk about it right now. Then what about the Wii? Why didn’t none of yall Niggaknow niggas drop some shit about the Wii? Maybe Eddie Ed will give yall a real review.

But here’s why I’m not going near that shit:

- As motherfucking usual, them faggot Pearl Harbor sleepyheads at Nintendo who pay money to sleep naked next to them 14 year old bitches dropped a whole lineup of gay motherfucking games. That’s my first problem: this Wii shit not catered to niggas. Oh, damn, TLRNY, you may say, that’s what you always say about EVERYTHING. This shit, that shit, none of this shit real enough for a nigga. Whatever, nicca, look at this shit and tell me I’m wrong.

Okay, TLRNY, you prolly thinking. What about them games like Red Steel? That shit be real violent. You can buck Hiroshimoshi niggas or slice they faces with samurai swords and shit. What you think bout that shit, TLRNY?

- Lemme respond with this image cuz i dont feel like writing shit

Look at them white motherfuckers flailing they arms, dancing around being mad intent and shit, bonding and shit over a motherfucking game where they control little girls with big ass heads and no arms. But WHO CARES IF YOU LOOK MOTHERFUCKING RETARDED? That Nintendo Wii be real motherfucking hip! You know why? Cuz of that fat caucazoid nigga in the leather beret. Which brings me to my last point.

-WHY THE FUCK EVERYTHING GOT TO BE COLORED WHITE NOWADAYS TO SELL THEY PRODUCTS. THAT SHIT AINT BEING ARTSY, YOU FUCKING HOMOS. GODDAMN.

That shit look a little too much like them lily cloud white iPods. You know what I feel about them iPods.

Any damn way niggas thats my two cents, nah mean. Maybe Eddie Ed gonna drop some shit bout this. Meanwhile, fuck that fake nigga Ben or whatever.

Its your boy Big Eddie Ed back at you with a new update. It ain’t technology, but its one of those things we got to cover because its some of that celebrity awareness shit. Now, you all know the shit that gone down with that nigga Kramer - he was getting heckled by some grimey ass niggas who were sitting through his whole act telling him how unfunny he is and saying some shit like thats why you ain’t got no TV shows or movies. I’ll tell you why the motherfucker got no TV Shows or movies - THAT NIGGA IS KRAMER.

You can’t go to no Kramer stand up comedy shit and expect to dumb out to some shit like its Cedric the Entertainer. You are surrounded by white motherfuckers, and you watching Kramer. This motherfucker is good at being jumpy and having tall hair. That’s all, nigga. It ain’t a comedy show if all you got is white motherfuckers in the audience, because white people ain’t got no sense of humor. I mean, when the fuck was the last time you seen a black prop comic? Say word on that.

Any damn way, this shit fucked that nigga Kramer for real. Any time white people express frustration or anger with anyone other than white people - they racist. That’s it and that’s all. That nigga Mel Gibson said some shit about the Jews when he all glazed and tipsy and now Braveheart ain’t never gonna see the light of day at a motherfucking Chabad house or whatever the fuck. That’s some serious reprucussions! You fuck up some shit like Kramer did and now you lose money. Plain and simple, and the proof that this shit is some earth shattering ass news is Jerry Seinfeld’s appearance on Letterman last night. Check that shit:

Oh, and if you ain’t done this shit already - watch that shit again. Also, when Seinfeld tells you the shit ain’t funny, it is. Say word.

One.