Them Moon Tapes is Missing
Something dawned on this nigga yesterday that further impressed upon me that white motherfuckers are straight up stupid. I was reading some motherfucking news and it turns out that the original tapes from the 1969 moon landing is missing. First off, lets rule out that bullshit ass excuse they gone give about them tapes being misplaced. How the fuck you gonna lose tapes that ain’t been touched for decades any damn how? Yeah.. like a nigga said: Those shits was robbed, and it ain’t who you think.
So now come the motherfucking investigation. Who stole them tapes? I have no motherfucking idea and before you point that craggly ass white index as a nigga you better realize that when it come to stolen tapes.. niggas are like “fuck the moon”. Only a white motherfucker would steal a tape of the motherfucking moon. Niggas is after them fine white socialite breezie tapes like that slow eyed bitch Paris Hilton.
You can’t blame black people for this shit. When the national archives holding down some of that nasty ass sex tape from those young white celebrity bitches, then you could holla at a nigga for sure.. but when some ancient ass moon tapes is missing you better break up every motherfucking Magic the Gathering game this side of the Mississipp to get at the culprit. That’s a white only crime, just like cannabalism or those three episodes of “Love Monkey”.
Actually, now that I think about that shit, if you want your motherfucking moon tapes back you do got TWO choices when it come to suspects. Pasty ass white motherfuckers, who been known to feed off they own, and them sleepyheads… and them sleepyheads is motherfucking NOTORIOUS for stealing shit and acting like they can’t even speak English 
or understand why the fuck you yelling when they lose a nigga sunday best throwback jersey. So to wrap this shit up, I’m going to say this: I DON’T GIVE A SHIT. Shout at a nigga when you decide its time to rain down on them sleepyhead throwback stealing motherfuckers and then I’ll be all about your bitch-made ass moon tapes. I’ll actually fight along side a white motherfucker in the name of a motherfucking sleepyhead free for all.. but if you can’t make that shit go down, fuck it. I mean a nigga got better shit to do. I’m out. One.
What’s missing are the never-before-broadcast clear original videos - not the grainy converted pictures the world watched on television more than three decades ago.
???????????
What the fuck?? Why would NASA have released the grainy, no-good photos and held back the motherfucking crystal clear moonshots 40 years ago? That don’t make no damn sense. Unless of course it’s all tied into that NOBODY WENT TO THE DAMN MOON IN THE FIRST PLACE conspiracy and these high quality pics are the proof of that!
Agreed Big Ed, black folk likely didn’t thief those photos, but if NASA really wants em back, all they need do is get motherfucking Bill Clinton to proclaim a “Return Them Photos Fatwa” and black folk would be falling all over them damn selves to recover that sacred space property. Nah mean?
The moon shit was a fraud! Those bitches filmed that bullshit in Arizona. No Doubt
CWTR™
the original shit was like a motherfucking slide show.. 10 frames per second!
I mean, they just took the same motherfucking footage they “lost” and repeated every motherfucking frame 6 times so it could get on TV.. why the fuck cant they edit that shit and remove the extra motherfucking frames.. aint nasa got photoshop????
Not to mention notice the refelctions on the damn helmets during filming of the moon walk? Arizona desert is a perfect ground for moon walking.
Did you know that there was a breeze on the moon…… Damn that flag was blowing all over the place up there!
Fuck the US government!
CWTR™
Damn sleepyheads stole they photoshop too.
imma get that motherfucking throw.. fuck them sleepyheads.. the next yao ming nigga i see wearin the old school Wes Unseld shit is getting dropped.
Bill Clinton is the greatest motherfucking American of ALL time. That cat would STILL be in office if it weren’t for that UNdemocratic 2 term rule.
solomon:
no motherfucking doubt. bill clinton was a motherfucking nigga in white motherfucker clothes.
That nigga Bill sho did have this gat damn economy in check back in the day.
Shit was off da hook! Now we got some backwoods hillbilly bitch running the show.
Ain’t that some muthafuckin shits?
Bout as much shit as motherfucking snakes on motherfucking planes!
Oh Snap!
Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking 22nd amendments on this motherfucking Constitution! Bring back my nigga Bill Clinton!
Nahnahnah ….
You want to move as many of them cracker-ass politicians in and out of DC as fast as possible. Cuz them motherfuckers hang around, then they make motherfucking friends with other white motherfuckers — then they start making plans on how they goin jack all the niggas. Like that thieving motherfucker Randy Cunningham.
Naaaaa, man.
Move them crackers through as fast as possible and then send them back to whatever cracker-ass district sent them in the first fucking place. It ain’t like there ain’t a bunch of motherfuckers able to do the job. That stupidass Bush done proved that shit. If he can do the job, any motherfucker can.
No future
No future
No future for you
No future
No future
No future for me
No future
No future
No future for you
No future
No future for you
First off — the only reason we went to the moon or faked it or whatever the fuck was to piss off those white commie bastards — and now they are all gone so we don’t need those tapes anyway — fuck those commies; they are all dead and buried now.
Those tapes were probably stolen by some fucked-up country with major USA envy — like France. Those frenchies are going to photoshop that film and put little red berets on Neil Armstrong and say they too went to the moon. Bunch of stinky fucks!!!
The Canadian government stole them, and Mr. Omar there was largely responsible for the scheme, my niggas.
The United States government did not make it to the moon in 1969, but they did make it in 1972 with Eugene Cernan, that one was real. He placed a flag there, in case other nations ever made it to the moon and exposed the Armstrong hoax.
Back in the day ya didn’t have high-quality broadcasting like we do today. Any of you niggas watched them colorized tapes of World War II? That was made off the original recordings.
NASA wanted to make a quick buck and do the same thing, but nobody knows where they left the fucking things. I don’t know if they stolen, I think the government wouldn’ta admitted they lost the damn things if someone jacked ‘em. I think it’s typical NASA “Oh we miscalculated and now 8million just crashed into Mars. Oops!” bullshit.
They ain’t never gonna find them tapes. I got a copy of ‘em here some nigga in Hong Kong hooked me up with though. Any nigga can see there’s strings attached to them ships, and there’s a deleted scene with Armstrong and Aldrin tag-teaming Marylin Monroe in a crater. This shit’s T.I.T.E.
I’d like to see that tape
black jesus:
preach on my nigga.. preach on
Ain’t that some muthafuckin shits?
yo, we can definitely collab.
i was actually thinking about hitting you guys up so we could jump on this:
http://www.gawker.com/news/top/living-embodiment-of-caucasianess-keepin-it-real-193326.php
but now everyone done did their own wack-ass spoof…
but hit me up on e. it’s on the blog and in my profile.
word.
Nice blog. thanks.
I live in Portugal
Lisbone-Portugal, 17/08/06
The real and fo-true Jesus is BLACK Jesus!
Can I get a amen?
AMEN
Amen
Praise! Black Jayyyyzus!
“Black Jesus” is redundant like “white George Allen.”
Seamus, my son, I was just clarifying that for all the white motherfuckers that read this.
Personally, I wouldn’t be bragging up the case that Jesus may have been black. That stupid cocksucker been nuthin but trouble since, well, year zero. Let whitey take the motherfucking fall for that clown.
I dodn’t tell niggas to act a fool in my name, they did that they damn selves.
You KNEW what you were motherfucking doing riding into Jerusalem during Passover making a big show of yourself. What did you think the Romans were going to do, throw you a party? You been acting the fool since day one.
Yeah that was a pretty niggarish moment for me…but I’m not the one that told niggas to act a fool in my name my son, they decided that on their own.
“Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword.
“For I have come to turn ‘a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law - a man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.’”
Oh, and I suppose you didn’t say THAT.
Nigga please.
Trouble making fool.
I didn’t write that motherfucking book either, presuming you pulled that from the Bible. That sounds like something White Jesus would say.
Mathew said, YOU, said that.
Apparently you told Luke, “I have come to bring fire on the earth, and how I wish it were already kindled!”
You got a selective memory Jesus.
He said to them, “But now if you have three whores, I will take two of them, and also a donkey; and if you don’t have whores, sell your cloak and buy them… The disciples said, “See, Lord, here are two whores.” “That is enough,” he replied.
(Luke 22:36,38)
Luke? Nigga fuck Luke, I don’t give a damn what he said I said. If I say that YOU said that you like dicks and fantasize about bottoming for Hitler, does it make it true? Hell no!
Selective memory these nuts.
Whoa, Black Jesus, you just like that eaglewood motherfucker. A couple of little shoves and off you go. Breath Black Jesus, breath….
I think you meant breathe.
Breath rhymes with what I may just have to inflict on you for embarrassing Mister Omar.
Damn, this new look is, as a white motherfucker would say, Totally Sweet.
I dig how you reskinned the site too. Omar man, why you pickin a fight with black Jesus? It’s anglo-Christ that you need to put on trial. The man on the velvet painting over your canopy bed ain’t never BEEN to the middle east. He’d fry crispier than a catfish!
Black Jesus never hurt nobody that didn’t deserve it. Water to wine, gettin beaten down by the authorities, you don’t get any blacker than that.
Fuck anglo-Jesus and his six-pack abs. Ya don’t work in the hot sun and have a snowey complexion anyhow.
out
Tallest Blue,
Black Jesus, Anglo Jesus, motherfucking Purple Jesus, I got problems with them all. Yeshua Bar Yusef is a long ago DEAD motherfucker that did not die for anyones sins, but was executed for breaking laws by the authorities of the day. Shall we have a look at this motherfuckers rap sheet?
-Blasphemy against the most high.
-Violating the law and the sabbath.
-Practising sorcery.
-Disturbing the peace.
-Destroying property.
-Threatening the Temple.
And the motherfucking coup de gras — Inciting revolt against the empire.
Nope, this turd should have been shuffled off to the motherfucking dust-bin of history long ago.
WHAT???
Black Jesus got contributor status?? I may just have to boycott in protest!
Wait until Solomon gets wind of this motherfucking shit!
A belief in a Black Jesus is just a motherfucking way for black folk to justify having endured all they motherfucking shit that’s been perpetrated on them in the name of that motherfucking false prophet. Jesus wasn’t no caucasian, but he sure wasn’t any damn negro.
Negro.
Had to fix that motherfucking spelling mistake so that motherfucking Grammar Nazi, Woozie, don’t cry the motherfucking blues.
Well then you punk bitch, what race was I?
Considering you were born in the Middle Eastern country of Judea, to Jewish parents, I’d say you are some sort of Arab. But, your moms was a huge slut so some say you could have been the bastard-child of a Roman Centurion, so you could be Italian.
I do agree with you that my mother was a total whore. Being as how she was a total whore, isn’t it possible that she had a bit of the jungle fever and took her ass down to the Congo? Perhaps you and I are distant cousins?
We lost the space race against the Russians. Thats why shit is missing. Holla!
OOOOOOOOOOOMERCY LOL THEM TAPES ARE GONNA SHOW UP ON E BAY AFTER MR BUSHIT LEAVES OFFICE, ROFL HE STOLE THEM THE FUCKING TAPES WAS A FAKE WE NEVER LANDED ON NO MOTHERFUCKING MOON BESIDES ALL DAT SHIT WHO EVEN GIVES A FUCK ABOUT THE MOON? FUCK THE MOON FUCK THE TAPES FUCK SPACE FUCK THE SHUTTLE
FUCK THE HUBBLE FUCK BURGER KING
FUCK FRENCH FRIES FUCK OSAMA FUCK MY TRUCK FUCK THE LANDLORD FUCK THE RENT PAYMENT FUCK THE BANK LOAN
FUCK MY BITCH AND FUCK GOING SHOPPING FUCK CHINESE FOOD AND FUCK MY COMPUTER MOUSE FUCK MY BATH ROOM FUCK MY BATHTUB FUCK MY TOILET FUCK MT SHIT PAPER AND FUCK MY TV FUCK THESNOW IN THE DRIVEWAY FUCK THE SNOW SHOVEL AND FUCK MY GRILL FUCK MY ASH TRAY FUCK MT BIC LIGHTER BUT DON’T FUCK WITH MY CHRONIC!!!!ZZZZZZZZZZ#~~